Almost.

I almost lost another baby, yesterday. almost.
Autumn Monday went out on wednesday night, a normal routine for her,
to take a night walk or sight seeing before she returns back home midnight.
Subuh semalam, aku bangun dan pura-pura tenang bila aku tengok mangkuk makanan dia tak berusik.
Pergi kerja, lalui rutin robot macam biasa. berkejar menyelesaikan apa yang perlu.
sampai waktu tengah hari bila adik hantar mesej bertanya tentang Autumn. dan itulah waktu aku tahu aku harus berdepan realiti-
My baby girl went missing.
So i texted adik and tell her what she needs to know. Asked angah to actually spread out the cat litter which is seldom used by Autumn, cause I once read the tips to call back your kitties is by doing so.
Sampai rumah lepas kerja semalam, dalam hujan renyai aku intaikan juga kawasan depan surau,
mengharap kalau sudah sampai masa berpisah kami, biar aku temukan tubuhnya. masih, tak jumpa.

After shower, tried to call for her from every single place where she can used as entrance door, verandah bilik ummi, tingkap bilik belakang, tingkap dapur, pintu bawah, still, no sign of her. Tapi sama macam hari Tabby keluar sehari suntuk tak balik-balik kelmarin dulu, I can feel like I could actually heard Autumn's collar's bell. Percayalah, aku simpan harapan tinggi untuk dengar dia mengiau masuk dalam bilik.

I went to bed last night with teary eyes. Aku tak boleh tidak rasa takut. I've lost Puteh, We've lost Moktam. Another lost is predictable, but I was never prepared for any. Doa sebelum tidur, sehabis harap aku berserah.

I woke up this morning, I have no heart to go to work. Hati, kepala cuma harap akan nampak kelibat si putih tu balik depan pintu rumah as I opened the door this morning while tunggu Abah siap-siap to fetch me to work. Tabby turun, macam faham kerisauan aku, he tried to asked for some attention, and I did pay attention, but I couldn't stop myself from asking Autumn's whereabout.

Kerja, banyak. Aku buat, habis separuh hati.

Sampailah, received a sudden call from Angah.

"Long, Autumn dah balik."

ALHAMDULILLAH! ALHAMDULILLAH!

She's back, safe and sound. With a little bruise, and starving stomach.

I couldn't smile any wider than I did. =)

Though someday, things like this might happen again, I wish they stayed with us for as long as it could be.

I can't prepare myself to lose any of them. ANY.